Am I a feminist?

Ok, this blog again comes after a long time.
I have been doing too much of a travel and getting too less time to spend alone as well. I am either with family, or with colleges and if not anything, I drive. I can’t read or write when I am driving. So in one my recent flight back from my home, I picked up this book of Chetan Bhagat – One India Girl.
Many people do not like Indian authors and I feel it’s like a style statement for people to say “I hate Indian Authors” or “I hate Indian Actors”. I love them both. I love Chetan Bhagat’s books and also Indian actor’s movies including Shahrukh Khan. At the end of the day, it’s their profession and they worked hard to reach wherever they are. I respect that fact.

For those who have read the book, they know where this blog is coming from. And for those “Who don’t read Indian authors”, I am not going to write the summary here. The authors write to sell their books and I will respect that fact also.


So the blog is about random thoughts which came to my mind me while reading the book.

•Does Indian society still cannot accept women who are opinionated and feminist?

If a girl doesn’t follow the norms, does that mean she is “mad”, “crazy” or “needs a psychiatric treatment? ’ Just because you or your family have been doing something or it’s been happening that way in society, is not just the right way to do certain things.

Times change, things change, opinions change. If you haven’t changed, that is not my problem or girl’s problem. But that doesn’t mean I need to follow each and everything the way it has been. I can create my own ways. I CAN have opinions about things which may not be the same as what you have been thinking. If 24 was the right age according to you have girls married, for me it could be 30 or even 32. If multiple degrees is a wastage according to you, earning money to do nothing is a wastage according to me. The

Indian society needs to stop judging girls and women with their differences in thoughts and opinions, for now we have reached a state where we have stop bothering about what the society thinks or says as well.
If society thinks, women will eventually give up on their differentiated thoughts and opinions, it could be other way round as well.



•Do Indian parents still brag about the weddings of their daughters than their education or career?

Recently I had been to a wedding and while returning my Mom-in-law said “if I would have had a daughter, this is how I would have done the wedding”. No offense to her or anything or their thoughts. I respect her for the level of sacrifices she has made and at the end of the day, I can empathize with her for being a women as well.

Fortunately or unfortunately – my parents believed in bragging about our education qualification and degrees we earned. They believed in showcasing our talent. Given a choice they would have preferred displaying the trophies and degrees during the wedding rather than jewelry or sarees. It was extremely disappointing for me that in my wedding, all extended relatives asked about jewelry and saree and not what I have studied and where I am working or what I am earning.

I wondered, I can never have my mother in law saying, if I would had a daughter, I would have ensured she would got this degree or become a doctor, engineer or a scientist. They still believe in teaching their daughter household work than making them financially independent by educating them.


•Does women still have to choose between their career and home?

Why do we always need to make a decision? Can a guy make the same decision or can I even dare to ask him that? Please sit at home and look after kids and I will play your role. When we don’t, why do women still have to come across this questions? We both go out and work, we both can share the household chores easily. My last blog has too many details on this so I am not elaborating further.


•Can Indian society accept the girl earning more than their son?

Million dollar question. I do not have an answer. Probably there should be a survey done on matrimony.coms to understand this point.

For me, I do not see anything wrong, but then yes, guys need to plan how they manage to keep up with expenses, if their wives decides to take a break or rather a maternity break.
Will society have a problem? As long as we lie to them and show the guys salary as more, they wouldn’t I suppose. Before the wedding, you disclose, chances of getting married is less. After the wedding, if it is disclosed, chances of marriage to break is more, for they can hurt the ego of men by saying “she is showing off with her income” without anyone doing anything!

Guys need to take a call- do they want to disclose their salaries as high or low, or they do not want a girl to be earning more at any point of time in their life! Or even better would be that they let society take the decision for them!


•Are there things which a son can do but daughter in law cannot?

This point is bit confusing again. There are things which a son can do, but not a daughter or daughter-in-law. The movie Pink has shown this thought excellent for women who drink are bad, but ok when son do it. Girls in relationships before or after the wedding are wrong, but guys doing that is perfectly ok. There is another aspect to this. There are things which they don’t want their son to do, but daughter or daughter-in-law is expected to do. Follow certain rituals. Learning to cook. Looking after kids!!!and many more. Please do refer to my earlier blog for this again! Either let us do everything which your son does, or let us not do anything which they are not doing. This line in between is too confusing to understand. Let things be just “black and white” and not “grey”!



To conclude : Just because I am girl, a daughter, a sister, a wife, a daughter-in-law, a mother and a mother-in-law, I don’t have to be shock absorbent, taunt absorbent, sadness and humiliation absorbent. I have my opinions and my thoughts. I have the right to know certain and do certain things. My way is the right way! Yes, I am saying the same your way is YOUR RIGHT WAY- keep it to yourself and let ME do things my way! And does doing things my way makes me a feminist? If yes, then I am happy being called a FEMINIST!

Modern Indian Women! A different fight has begun!

Gone are the days when we were fighting for right to education. Today more number of women are post graduates and Ph.D.’s as compared to last decade based on an article that I had recently come across. But the article also said the number of women working are way less as compared to men. Which means the fight to education is won, but fight to work and independence has just begun! Listing down some of the questions that women are facing in today’s world.
Note: Most of these are assumed and based on generic discussions with people. It is not specific to any individual or circumstances! Note inspired by some of the recent Bollywood movies! Lol.

•Why do you need to go out and work?
Recently I have come across question from many people “why do you or rather women need to go out and work?” I had a ready cooked answer “I have studied all through my life to work, want to earn and be independent.” I left the city where my parents lived and came to Bangalore just to make a career. Women work because they get to interact with people of the same wavelength rather than watching imaginary serials or so called soaps on television. Some do want to be financially independent and some work because they just love to work.

•Why do you work so long hours, why can’t you quit and relax
So from working, it becomes long hours of work. I don’t think I work too long. There are guidelines laid by every company to work “x” number of hours. Men and women both work same number of hours. So why only women have to answer to the questions like long hours of work? And yes most of the companies have flexi working hours, work from home option. Everyone adopts to what suits them the best based on their roles at home and at work.

•Can you do work from home to finish this house work?
Ok, so somehow to strike a work life balance, if a woman choses to do work from home, it is often misunderstood for work FOR home. I “work” from home means I put in equal “x” numbers of hours and additional “y” number which I waste in travelling. I work from home and at the same time, I finish the work for which my presence at home is required. For the nuclear based families, getting a delivery of a gas cylinder, getting an important courier and document needs someone’s presence. Or if vehicle is not available for commute, choosing to do a work from home is a better option. But often work from home is confused with doing nothing at home or just sleeping and relaxing. Women in work from home, do double the work- office and the house work!

•If you are travelling too far, it is because you choose to work!
Let’s now talk about the “y” number of hours. I have come across multiple cases recently where the house and offices are too far for women in the house as compared to men. I can include myself in one of those cases and you can see my Facebook wall full of photos struck in traffic. Often Facebook says you have a memory to share and I laugh at myself looking at traffic struck photos or posts, as most of the times, I would be stuck in traffic reading those memories. So women HAVE to travel because they choose to work? Wondering!! If that is an acceptable reason for travelling long distances to work.

•Whatever I earn is to fulfil my fantasies
Ohk, agreed to some extent. But the earning also leads to expenses. If I am working, a part of it goes for my car fuel, car servicing, car cleaners and probably EMI also. So I shouldn’t take car and choose office transport is the justification. Doesn’t matter if I am the first pick and last drop, wherein I get picked at 7.00am in the morning for 9.00 o’clock office and get dropped at 8.00 pm when my office gets over at 6.00 as that I should be using that travel time to plan what I have to cook after I get back home and may be to order fruits and veggies from big basket also. Without diverting, what I earn is not just to fulfil my fantasies of Cinderella shoes but I do have to buy more set of formal clothes, more visits to palor and also contribute for the household expenses equally or rather more than men do!

•The house and kids are ignored if a woman is working
I don’t understand why only women are told that the house and kids are ignored because they go to work. When I contribute to the earnings of the house equally, I spend equal or more amount of time to work and travel, isn’t running house and taking care of kids, an equal responsibility of all the members of the family. Do men get more tired and women are superwomen to take care of work, kids, travel and home, all at the same time?

•If you can’t work, hire a maid, a cook and helpers for everything
Ohk, cool. Who will search for them? Who will have to track when they don’t come or when they will come? And I add additional expense in my earning. An additional stress gets added and the direction part of doing what work still lies with the women. Why?



It is bad that women’s work and income is still considered secondary and Men are considered the breadwinner of the family. Doesn’t make a difference even if women works equally hard and earns equally or rather more in some cases, and she still is solely responsible for running the house.

Working outside is not a burden as long as all the household work is shared equally between man and woman. Working is not a waste of time because women just not hold the responsibility to take care of the house and kids, they have dreams too. Working is not always for money, it’s about knowing the world and gaining new experiences. Girls are brought up in the same way as guys, but why should only a women compromise with their career and life to run the house?

Don’t teach only your daughters to run the house, wash utensils, wash clothes and to do the cooking and cleaning. Teach your son also to do all household work. It’s just not his responsibility to work outside and earn, he also has the responsibility to make a house a HOME!

At the cost of these questions, some women give up on their careers, dreams and aspirations, later to hear from people “Who had asked you to quit? You took your own decision”. And some continue to fight for it.

Digital Marketing

For the first time in my blogs, I am hitting straight on the title –Digital Marketing!! Honestly, I have been too fascinated with this word and I have no idea why! We are all using some or the other digital stuff but then Digital Marketing is something interesting.

During my MBA, we were given a project called “Sell Yourself”. Well sounds weird, but that exactly what each of us today are doing. No offence or wrong meaning please. Each of us are selling our capabilities, knowledge, humanity or anything which is unique in us. How we do we do that? And the obvious answer is through Digital Marketing! We are marketing our capabilities, our thoughts and last but not the least we are creating an image or what we call as a brand in the corporate term! We are creating our own brand to sell ourselves. Most of us are on Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, lots of people blog (Like me- there!! I am marketing my capability to write, lol)

From a layman perspective, or atleast that was my perspective till I didn’t do a bit of reading, that social media marketing is digital marketing. Well, that’s not right. Social media marketing is just one part of the digital marketing and this social media marketing includes all forms of networking sites like FB, Twitter, you tube etc.

What we don’t know, which may be a digital marketer knows , for which he or she gets a decent pay package is that Digital marketing also involves other things like
•Search Engine Optimization
•Search Engine Marketing or Online Advertising,
•Email Marketing
•Analytics
•Social Media Marketing

And why are these a part of Digital Marketing? Answer is very simple. We need some digital gadget to do marketing or the follow ups as in the analysis of these. Most of this wouldn’t exist without a gadget. Or rather any of these wouldn’t work without a digital gadget.

So let me give a definition to Digital Marketing. Any form of marketing or marketing related activity which involve a digital tools or gadget is called as digital marketing. Does that mean that we were not doing digital marketing in olden days when we didn’t have these modern day gadgets like tab or mobile? No, we did do that but the target audience was not limited or to put better it was more of a mass marketing as compared to a targeted marketing.

Every coin has two sides and so does digital marketing. If from a seller’s perspective, it’s a boon, from a customer’s perspective I don’t know if I should call it a bane or what, but it is definitely not safe. Last weekend we had been to an exhibition for some house hunt and at every stall that we stopped by; we had to give in our mobile numbers and email Ids. And when my husband passed the form to me, I ensured that I give his mobile number and e-mail than mine. Finally when we came out, I was giggling telling him that I had given his number everywhere. Well that was a joke until he came back home to see his mail ID already flooding with mails related to the property. Some database would have been created and the details had got circulated. We don’t need any Swami on radio to trouble people by sharing their numbers. If you really want to trouble someone or get some work done, just send out their mobile numbers and Email Ids and your work would be done!

Limited to what I knew and what I found interesting, I felt I should write something .Now I will post the link of my blog on FB, LinkedIn ,use WhatsApp and emails send the link to my friends or reviewers! Hence using digital marketing to sell my capabilities! Please do share your review and comments on the blog.(Another form of digital marketing!)

Beware!!Caution Note- I have an analytics engine to measure the reach and know how many people read this blog. And the tool helps me to understand the geographies from where people have read it and the source that has been used. I have been using this analysis for last few years. Hence the concept is not new, it always existed and it is we the customers who have made digital marketing a buzz today!

Policy Makers

The policy makers at office, please install an attendance recorder at home of each employee and check the number of hours they spend at home. I think it would be way less than number of hours they spend in their work location/offices.

Policy makers are senseless people who think, by putting in more number of hours, they will get more work done from employees. In manufacturing sector- yes I agree, but then they should be policy makers of manufacturing and not an IT company! It makes us work less, as we are unhappy with your increasing hour policies and strict attendance recording systems.

Policy makers should be the people who are actually suffering. Ask a lady who is going to bear a child, or the one who leaves her infant with some caretaker at home to make a policy, she will never make one where employees are asked to spend 9.5 hours at work.

And the best part, those whose job doesn’t require them to be social, those people try to become social. During a peak hour, I am waiting at a signal for more than 20 minutes , close to Rajbhavan of Bangalore and two traffic police are talking forgetting to change the signal from red to green. The road behind has jammed for few kilometers, and people from the end are honking to tell those F******* to change the signal. Finally one biker got down went and yelled at the cop and that’s when the signal changes! Mind it policy makers, they were socializing. Please note socializing is not required for all roles, those who need, let them. Those who don’t can sit at home working and give some relief to the traffic of Bangalore!

Are we really socializing in those 9.5, that they remove the work from home policies also? We made friends in college who help us switch jobs, but we don’t meet them often or on a daily basis. What are we going to get by meeting colleagues on daily basis? Please make one day a week compulsory for all, we might make the best use of that, instead asking us to come every day to socialize.

Policy makers sounds so over confident while changing their policies saying “If you are not happy, please leave the organization. We have thousands waiting out there to join us”. Well if employees are not happy, they are sure to leave. You took time to apply such stringent rules. They will take time to look out for job, and there are thousands of liberal organizations out there waiting for capable employees to join as well.

I recently came across some article which said “Employees leave because of their managers and not an organization”. Well I disagree as poor supervisors also struck in a situation where they have to follow the policies laid by organization; unfortunately they have to enforce them upon their juniors without a choice becoming a ravan like figure in front of the subordinates. At the same time, they have to keep them happy to ensure they do their work. Managers are in a soup! But not all employees understand and they happily leave blaming their seniors!

Policy makers should never be exposed the numbers, as in the profits of an organization. They are not there to save money, but to save people from leaving an organization and help employees grow, so that the organization grows. And finally policy makers should undergo some very difficult EQ(Emotional Quotient) exams than IQ, where they should to examined understand each and every employee emotionally. But then who will make the policy for these exams? It has to be some policy maker! ;)

Note: This blog has no relevance to any person in reality and only the expressions of some random thoughts.

Stay Blessed!

I have no idea what triggers me to write, but it is always a trigger.

Off late, I have been listening to the RJs while my travel to office and back from office to home, I feel ‘blessed are the people who can work or do what they love to do the most’. On that note I love to talk, but I can’t talk to laptop all through the day. lol.

I had been to a party this Friday and I see a gang of DJs (I was a part of this gang fortunately) dancing with one DJ playing the music standing on the top on a podium built for the console. I was never fond of or rather in the habit of listening to English music and looking at the passion, power and fun that these guys were having, I came out singing aloud , tonight’s gonna be a good night!!!! And again this feeling had hit me hard that ‘blessed are the people who can work or do what they love to do the most.’

I am going to list down some of the professions where I feel blessed are these people to work or do what they like to and are still minting money. Well it’s not always the money, but more important is the satisfaction, peace and happiness they get! I may be right, I may be wrong also as we say grass is always greener on the other side.

Gym instructors: Man!! All they do is to train people and be fit themselves and doing that they get money. As I everyday wait at Sankey signal for more than 3 minutes (waiting time),I see people gyming at the gym which could be seen from there. I seriously feel jealous. I am sitting inside the car honking at other vehicles and they are blissfully interacting with people, keeping themselves fit and enjoying their work.

Movie review writers: They get entertainment and their organizations pay them to go and watch movies! Bet you can’t be at a better place if you are a movie lover! You are blessed is all I can say. Well I can also put book review writers in this category but time taken to write a review is longer, which doesn’t matter as long as a person loves to read and write.

Dance teachers: I used to learn dance when I was a kid and I believe most of us have learnt as kids, but only few of them get the opportunity to take that up as a career. I can put artists and musicians also in this category. No doubt the monetary back up is needed until a person establishes themselves but more important is how passionate are you to really take that up as a career.

Play cricket and earn: Well not just cricket but all the sports like badminton or tennis. However this isn’t an easy one as my hubby (part of under 14 Indian cricket team) tells his stories about the training and sessions before and after the match. Well nothing is easy in that case, but the sportsmen still get paid to play. It is also true that you have to be in the right country in the right sports which I believe is a bit of luck as well. How many of us would wait for sports (PET) class during the school, but only few may have the guts to take up coaching or training for a sport as a career. For the rest it is a 45 min class which gets over as we finish schooling.

Cartoonist: Well I am not sure how much this professional is valid in today’s digital era, but still all they have to do is to create something creative. The Amul adds always makes me wonder that “how creative the team should be to come up with idea then and there when something (good or bad) happens”.

Photo journalist: When my sister was in the profession of journalism, one of her photo journalist friend would come home, eat and talk about it. All he has to do is to click. He loved photography there he was looking at pics clicked by him in the newspaper the following day. Well we can also include wedding photographers as that’s a booming business but blessed are the photographers who love to click and get paid well for that.

Well these are few which came to mind and there could be many more. As it is said that “Do what you love to do and love what you do”. Most of us don’t have a choice but to love what we do as we fall into the second category.

Hence I would call them blessed who get to do what they love to do!! No, they are not confined to 4 walls of their cubicles; most of them don’t bother about the pay cheques at the end of the month as they live each day and every day is a new challenge .Something more creative, some more fun is always in store for them. They do not look at the watch for the day to get over as they are doing what they love to do. Stay Blessed!

Overconfidence Vs Overconfidence Vs Overconfidence

The start is going to be too abrupt for the blog. But I really had no idea where to begin as I had only random thoughts to write about.
Whenever I tell my husband, this work is to be done and he replies too promptly “yes it will be done”, all I say is “you sounded too overconfident”. To which without a miss he would reply “not overconfident BUT CONFIDENT”. Most of the times, my sentence wouldn’t have been complete also that he says it will be done.

My blog is not about being confident and overconfident. Throughout in our student and professional days we come across these terms and people say don’t sound to overconfident whether it may be an interview, a presentation or daily life.

I am going to write and draw a comparison between overconfident vs overconfident vs the 3rd kind of overconfident people. I have been coming across too many people these days and I am surprised by different kinds of confident attitude of people.

The first set of overconfident people are those who are very sure what they want in life and have clearly defined paths as to how they are going to achieve it. They have all the equipment’s or say support system in terms of their families, finances and their education in place. They know by hook or crook, they will get the work done. And these people are so confident that everything is going to work in their favor always , which often does , they become over confident.

The 2nd set of people who know they have nothing to lose even if they try something new and different. For them, no support system is required as the support system is a liability for them. They break away and are completely free. These are the people who are driven by passion and they will do what they like to do. They also do what they don’t like to get the resources through these means to do what they like. These set of people have been the most empathetic set of people, and live life free. They live life as if there is no tomorrow. When we see such people in the crowd, they are different. They are noticeable by the charm and happy go lucky nature. They are overconfident but for good.

Finally the 3rd set of overconfident people. They don’t have any support system in place. No proper education or family support in place. They have no idea what they want to do in life, no passion. They will get up and say “ oh no , just another day” and believe me you take the opportunity in a platter and keep it right in front of them, they will want to wait and see what better they can get and say “I can’t do this, I am used to doing some particular thing or this not how I have been doing things”. They will have all reasons to procrastinate and believe me they are completely overconfident about their lives too. Their frustration gets converted to overconfidence and they learn to give a S*** to good as well as the bad things in life. Well they crib too and the moment someone want to help them, they start sounding overconfident. They want to sit, relax and get everything what they don’t deserve as well!!!!

So Mr. /Ms. Reader- what type of confident person are you? Ahem i asked confident , not overconfident!

And now I am scared that next time when I tell my husband ‘ you sound overconfident’, he shouldn’t come back asking ‘ which type of overconfident people are you referring me to?’ rather than his usual reply! But yes I am too overconfident that he may not have the time to read what’s written :-)

Note: There is no relevance to any person in reality.

Namma Bengaluru Traffic

It has been quite a long time that I blogged. But from the time of my last blog, till this one I met with a ‘good’ accident in my life. Question that strikes “how can an accident be ‘Good’ ”?On a lighter note I got married which according to me, till my last blog was a human made disaster which we all commit naturally and make it a natural disaster.lol. Well ‘FOR NOW’ it feels this ‘Change is for Good’.


The topic of this blog is how to fight the Bangalore’s traffic. The point is after being in Bangalore for close to three years, I realize this issue now as I started to experience the traffic only now. Till February this year, I had no commitments and I always chose to stay close to office, making use of all gym and cafeteria facility. Now the hard reality of traffic has struck because of my CHANGE FOR GOOD.I spend almost 3 to 3.5 hours of my day in traffic driving around 60 KMs to my work location. Most of the Bangaloreans do. As I spoke to people around, I heard most of them travelling for minimum 2 hours a day in traffic.In these two or three hours,a person can do whatever he wants to wishes to do.


One thing which makes me wonder is why do every individual need to go to the work location every day? Is the presence of each and every employee in an organization mandatory? I do understand there are some roles, which are highly critical and require the presence, but definitely not all as the number of people on the roads.
We have got connected to the remote locations of the world by technology, so why not within Bangalore. All that one needs is connectivity though a datacard or wifi and a continuous supply of power for laptops. All the newly constructed houses have that facility. And I am sure namma wifi strategy for Bangalore would help each one of us connected even more as compared to any other times. For now we can still manage with 3G Datacards.


Some of my thoughts which would help in fighting the traffic problem of Bangalore is provided below. Some are at the individual level, some at the Company level and few at the government level.

•Company & Government should define the roles where the mandatory presence is required and other should be asked to do a work from home(WFH)

•Company should make sure an individual whose presence is required is provided the housing within 2-5 kms of office location. I don’t think all members of a family would be working in ‘mandatorily presence’ role. One gets the accommodation, rest of them do a WFH.

•IT companies should make use of cabs as mandatory; the attendance to be recorded in cabs along with office premise, to ensure that 1 person does not occupy 1 car space on the road. For those who can’t use the cabs, they should give valid medical certificates and reasons for the same

•Government should give better training to traffic police in Bangalore, half of the issues are where there are traffic police and manual signals

•Government should provide HRA tax exemption only when the house is within 5 kms range of their office location. See number of people changing their house within few months.

•Government should construct foot over bridges. There are so many places where traffic issues arise only because the traffic is stopped for people to cross the road. We are not America yet that the traffic is stopped for public to walk and cross. It is required but not at the cost of commuters sitting and honking in the vehicles. To take some examples, crossing opposite esteem mall, Manyata tech park ring road crossing.

•Companies should have some incentive linked to number of KMs run by your car registered in the company on a monthly or quarterly basis. All the cars have system to measure the KMs. Lesser the KMs, more would be incentive as a CSR initiative. We are definitely going to save on energy by that.

•At an individual level, we can try and use metro and do carpooling. Not sure at the feasibility of that at this point of time in Bangalore, but it would help at the basic levels though.

•Government should build underground tunnel roads or long and high bridges for long distance travelers, but that’s not an immediate solution as well.



Let’s think and bring out of box solutions. Expanding the roads or Making traffic signals automated is not the right thing that would help to solve this as it’s not because of roads or signals but the core problem is number of vehicles on the roads are too high. That has to be brought down.



So what would be the cons?
Side effect of work from home may be argued upon that people may not be able to socialize. But we can bring solution to that by having one day of the week working where all employees have to come mandatory. Saves the gossip time and the would use the same for professional interactions.


The radio channels may suffer as number of people listening may go down. I keep listening to radio and they say ‘call me or WhatsApp me if you are stuck in traffic’. At times it helps as we realize that it not just us, buy many like us who are in the same boat suffering from the traffic problem, but I am sure Radio channels are innovative enough to get more listeners.


Let’s do something to bring a ‘Change for Good’ for Namma Bengaluru, as every CHANGE is for GOOD!