Gone are the days when we were fighting for right to education. Today more number of women are post graduates and Ph.D.’s as compared to last decade based on an article that I had recently come across. But the article also said the number of women working are way less as compared to men. Which means the fight to education is won, but fight to work and independence has just begun! Listing down some of the questions that women are facing in today’s world.
Note: Most of these are assumed and based on generic discussions with people. It is not specific to any individual or circumstances! Note inspired by some of the recent Bollywood movies! Lol.
•Why do you need to go out and work?
Recently I have come across question from many people “why do you or rather women need to go out and work?” I had a ready cooked answer “I have studied all through my life to work, want to earn and be independent.” I left the city where my parents lived and came to Bangalore just to make a career. Women work because they get to interact with people of the same wavelength rather than watching imaginary serials or so called soaps on television. Some do want to be financially independent and some work because they just love to work.
•Why do you work so long hours, why can’t you quit and relax
So from working, it becomes long hours of work. I don’t think I work too long. There are guidelines laid by every company to work “x” number of hours. Men and women both work same number of hours. So why only women have to answer to the questions like long hours of work? And yes most of the companies have flexi working hours, work from home option. Everyone adopts to what suits them the best based on their roles at home and at work.
•Can you do work from home to finish this house work?
Ok, so somehow to strike a work life balance, if a woman choses to do work from home, it is often misunderstood for work FOR home. I “work” from home means I put in equal “x” numbers of hours and additional “y” number which I waste in travelling. I work from home and at the same time, I finish the work for which my presence at home is required. For the nuclear based families, getting a delivery of a gas cylinder, getting an important courier and document needs someone’s presence. Or if vehicle is not available for commute, choosing to do a work from home is a better option. But often work from home is confused with doing nothing at home or just sleeping and relaxing. Women in work from home, do double the work- office and the house work!
•If you are travelling too far, it is because you choose to work!
Let’s now talk about the “y” number of hours. I have come across multiple cases recently where the house and offices are too far for women in the house as compared to men. I can include myself in one of those cases and you can see my Facebook wall full of photos struck in traffic. Often Facebook says you have a memory to share and I laugh at myself looking at traffic struck photos or posts, as most of the times, I would be stuck in traffic reading those memories. So women HAVE to travel because they choose to work? Wondering!! If that is an acceptable reason for travelling long distances to work.
•Whatever I earn is to fulfil my fantasies
Ohk, agreed to some extent. But the earning also leads to expenses. If I am working, a part of it goes for my car fuel, car servicing, car cleaners and probably EMI also. So I shouldn’t take car and choose office transport is the justification. Doesn’t matter if I am the first pick and last drop, wherein I get picked at 7.00am in the morning for 9.00 o’clock office and get dropped at 8.00 pm when my office gets over at 6.00 as that I should be using that travel time to plan what I have to cook after I get back home and may be to order fruits and veggies from big basket also. Without diverting, what I earn is not just to fulfil my fantasies of Cinderella shoes but I do have to buy more set of formal clothes, more visits to palor and also contribute for the household expenses equally or rather more than men do!
•The house and kids are ignored if a woman is working
I don’t understand why only women are told that the house and kids are ignored because they go to work. When I contribute to the earnings of the house equally, I spend equal or more amount of time to work and travel, isn’t running house and taking care of kids, an equal responsibility of all the members of the family. Do men get more tired and women are superwomen to take care of work, kids, travel and home, all at the same time?
•If you can’t work, hire a maid, a cook and helpers for everything
Ohk, cool. Who will search for them? Who will have to track when they don’t come or when they will come? And I add additional expense in my earning. An additional stress gets added and the direction part of doing what work still lies with the women. Why?
It is bad that women’s work and income is still considered secondary and Men are considered the breadwinner of the family. Doesn’t make a difference even if women works equally hard and earns equally or rather more in some cases, and she still is solely responsible for running the house.
Working outside is not a burden as long as all the household work is shared equally between man and woman. Working is not a waste of time because women just not hold the responsibility to take care of the house and kids, they have dreams too. Working is not always for money, it’s about knowing the world and gaining new experiences. Girls are brought up in the same way as guys, but why should only a women compromise with their career and life to run the house?
Don’t teach only your daughters to run the house, wash utensils, wash clothes and to do the cooking and cleaning. Teach your son also to do all household work. It’s just not his responsibility to work outside and earn, he also has the responsibility to make a house a HOME!
At the cost of these questions, some women give up on their careers, dreams and aspirations, later to hear from people “Who had asked you to quit? You took your own decision”. And some continue to fight for it.
