Arranged marriage Vs Love marriage

Aaj cafeteria me baat karte karte kuch energied feeling aayi. May be because of the coffee I had, or the pastry. Me n Lavanya are so crazy that we get high on a chai of India gate, or crushes of KFC. Ab yeh to coffee Tha. I got high, and topic we were earlier discussing throughout the day with friends and family was also unique. Will come to the topic later, but when high, what came across my mind was the dialogue from “Rang de Basanti” movie. By god we were crazy about the movie and siddharth and kunal during that time. I was more fascinated by the cool dialogue of siddharth. And being in university, the movie based on university is like a life time opportunity as one could clearly relate to it and enjoy.

Coming back the dialogue I remembered “is duniya me do(two) tarah ke log hote hain-ek jo hota hai hone do aur dusre, use badlne ki zimmedari uthao” and the topic of discussion today was arranged marriage versus love marriage. Comparing the dialogue and the following. People who opt for arranged marriage are the one-jo hota hai hone do. And abe aaye who special category – ussse badlane ki zimmedari uthao.

It is a usual thought that those who do love marriages are the happiest lot of the people. But I guess those who have done may not agree to the point as it is often difficult opting for a love marriage than an arrange marriage.

Have tried to draw comparison between arranged marriage (AM) versus love marriage (LM). Ab aaj kal wooh zamana kahan hai , jab kehte the, miya biwi raazi to kya karega kazi???kazi is not just one but in hundread’s and kya karega nahi , wohi sab karte hain, lets c the role played by the “Kazi”



Pre – marriage scene

1.In an AM you talk (with the guy/girl) with permission and in LM, you are never granted permission to talk (to parents), as it is never a talk but an argument.

2.In AM it is the headache of the parents to handle everything, in LM, it is our headache to handle everything

3.In AM the guy and the girl have all right to throw tantrums and to threaten, that I don’t like this, we don’t like that, in LM it’s the parents who throw tantrums and threatens us back.

4.In AM their respective friends are invited and are asked to give moral support to the girl or the guy, in LM, unhe bhi joote padte hain, all this happened because you were with this girl/guy (the friends). Everyone forgets, even if they wouldn’t have been there, this would have happened.

5.In AM , if guy and the girl likes each other, and yet the misunderstanding happens within the family, they have an ultimate option to elope, in LM, if family happens to like each other and between guy and girl misunderstanding happens (as the families which unlikingly like each other) because communication that travels through the couple and not the family, option to elope is not possible(miya biwi hi razi nahi ab to) ;-))

Humne badle ki zimmedari uthayi hai, ab realize hua, gaye the duniya ko badlne ,khudko badlne ki zimmedari uthali.

During the marriage

1.The uninvited, yet invited attendees in the marriages comments will be like this in the two cases.in AM “Dikhne me acha nahi hai ladka/ladki, par gun ache honge, tabhi hui na shad(however bad the guy or the girl may look)i”, in LM “kya soch ke karte hain shadi, dikhne me tak acha/achi nahi hai(however beautiful the guy and the girl will look)”. Kissi ne in logon se comment maanga tha????nahiii….

2.In AM, the guy and the girl look their best and in LM, guy and the girl look the worst of what they would have been during their life because of tension, ki bas shadi khatam ho and that’s it.

3.Taali yeriyachu(shadi khatam, mangalsutra pehna diya, fere bhi ho gaye). In AM girl’s mother and the family cries, in LM the guy’s mother and the family cries. Self explanatory.

4.Khana-an integral part of every marriage-In AM, usually it is optimum as the number of invitees is equal to number of attendees. In LM guaranteed shortage. As number of attendees is always the double of number of invitees. Agal bagal me sab padosiyon ko le jaate hain, pata hai mrs iyer/gupta ji ki beta/beti ne love maariage kiya hai, chalna shadi me , dekhen to sahi kaise hoti hai.lol

5.Finally time to go home(katti sadam mootai/Vidayi), in AM , it’s the girl and girl’s family again is crying as our daughter has become someone else’s, in LM no one cries, the girl goes back to place where she works, the guy will fly back to US, and the respective families go back where they live, mind it , all the places are usually different.

Humne badle ki zimmedari uthayi hai, ab realize hua, chale the shadi ka concept badle, yahan to post shadi concept bhi badalna pada. Yet we are fine till the time we are happy, and we are living apart.



Post – marriage scene

1.In AM only for one year after the marriage couple live with the guy’s family and in alone for the rest of the life, in LM, one year couple live alone, both of them also alone and then later,they land up living with the guy’s family as their schedules are so hectic that someone has to take care of kids.

2.In AM couple love each other after the marriage and in LM couple fight as they have already loved before the marriage

3.In AM , before the marriage , guy never compromises and after , he always compromises, in LM both compromise before the marriage and none compromise after the marriage

4.In AM, live happily because life is like how life should be, but in LM, life is all in mess, so ab life ko badlne ki zimmedari uthao, and with loads of difficulty they finally are settled in life like how it’s with the people in AM

5.Finally in both cases kids are like their parents, in AM , jo hota hai hone do, so kids and the parents are happy, in LM too kids are like their parents , par ab bachon ko badalne ki zimmedari uthao!;-)

In which category do you fall? Jo hota hai hone doge?ya badlne ki zimmedari uthaoge?